The Final Countdown

I know its been awhile guys and for that I apologize. Things have been crazy busy in our neck of the woods as we prepare for the final countdown. So what have we been up to? Well, my biggest boy had his last day of preschool and his "graduation," even though he is returning for another year before kindergarten. It was absolutely precious too. Each of the preschoolers made little graduation caps and those who were returning wore pink (because its his teacher's favorite color). Those making the leap into kindergarten wore black. I have to admit, my boy looked awful handsome in pink, don't you think?

that is his best friend in the whole world - Ben

We've also been spending tons of time with our boys since its the last time we will ever be a family of four. That sounds crazy to think that in just a short time we are going to be a family of five. And our big boys are going to be big brothers to boot - Riley for the second time and Hayden for the first. Craziness.

nothing like some ice cold chocolate milk after a good play at the park

getting the stink eye for taking his picture - haha

I should probably let you all know what's going on in terms of the baby, right? I haven't updated since there was the possibility I had developed cholestasis of pregnancy, but thankfully those labs came back fine. That meant Lukas got to bake for a wee bit longer. That means our precious boy is going to be here in....are you ready for it?.....4 days. Can I get a YIKES? We are quite literally in the final stretch and its both scary and exciting all at the same time. Its a terribly bittersweet time for me. On one hand I look forward so much to seeing my third little boy enter this world. I look forward to seeing his perfect face and touching his soft skin. I look forward to having him here and touching and kissing on him anytime I want. Then there is the other part of me. While I am so ready to have my boy here with us, I am totally not ready for what comes next because I know that's the hard part. I know that's when things are really going to get tough. That fear of the unknown really gets to me. Its amazing how this experience can be so much the same, yet so different at the same time. I know we will make it through though. I know somewhere in the abyss I will muster the strength and courage to work through it all and work to get my little boy's heart as healthy as it can be. I have faith in it all and that's what carries me through. We will get through this and we will be better and stronger for it. I just know it.

So this week is busy busy busy as we prepare everything to the best of our ability for the big day. Friday is right around the corner and I feel like I have a ton of stuff left to do. We are finishing up some last minute home projects, getting bags packed, and getting all of our plans and affairs in order. Tomorrow is the last NST I will ever have and the last time I will visit University Hospital until we welcome our beautiful boy. Just 4 more days. The time has really flown and I cannot believe this chapter of our lives is closing and a new one is about to begin. My c-section is scheduled for 1pm, but Jonathan and I are due in the OBICU at 11am to begin to process and get the ball rolling. Eeek! If you can spare a prayer or two, please pray for our family as the week draws to a close and we welcome our beautiful Lukas! 

P.S. - Happy birthday to my Daddy-o today - love you Papa Bear =)

Deep Thoughts.

I know it's been awhile friends. It has been an interesting couple of weeks around here. I haven't been feeling well or sleeping well, which means I am constantly exhausted and feel like I could fall asleep at pretty much any point in the course of my day. Now, there is the possibility a new complication has arose and its got me a little on edge. 

Yesterday morning I had an appointment for my twice weekly NST and a visit with my doctor. While I getting strapped up the nurse was going through her usual questions about whether I was contracting, bleeding, felt any pain, etc. I mentioned the fact that for the past two days or so I had been itching quite intensely. I have no rash or anything like that, just general itching. Everywhere. From head to toe. My hands, arms, legs, and ankles are the worst. She asked me a couple of questions and went and notified my doctor. She asked me to be sure to mention it as well when the NST was finished. While Lukas and I were strapped up and getting monitored my urine was being tested. This test showed I was spilling a large amount of ketones and the test went from moderate to severe in just a matter of minutes despite not having changed my eating or drinking habits at all. I had eaten breakfast and drank a bunch of water before going to my appointment, so they are not sure why that is happening. Especially such an extreme quantity. So while my NST went on the nurse sat and talked to me and we discussed all kinds of things from siblings to genetics. She was super nice and Lukas cooperated nicely. He had three great big accelerations, which made her very happy.

When the NST wrapped up she led me to an exam room. Outside I could hear a whole group of people talking ferociously about this itching I was feeling. Within a minute or two my doctor poked his head in the door and said "so I hear you are itching." I explained to him the sensation and he told me they were going to be doing some bloodwork, namely a liver enzyme test and a bile salt test. He explained they would do the liver enzyme test today and I would have the bile salt test first thing Monday morning, as I had to be fasting for it. He then went on to explain why. He told me in about 1 of every 1000 pregnancies mom can develop a condition called cholestasis of pregnancy, which is basically where the gallbladder either slows significantly or stops working all together. When this happens, bile acids begin to build up in the liver and eventually begin overflowing into the bloodstream. The condition itself really poses no risk to me, but it can cause a great deal of harm to Lukas. It is associated with stillbirth and distress, but he didn't tell me that until a bit later. So he said he was going to order the liver enzyme test and bile salt test and he would be back in a few minutes. A couple of minutes passed and he came back in with his nurse. That's when he talked to me a little bit more about the condition I may have developed - and also when he told me about the possible complications. He said if I do indeed have it Lukas will be coming this coming Friday, the 20th. I sat there a little shocked of course because I had planned on him being here the 3rd and did not really anticipate or expect any further complications to arise that may threaten him not making it to 39 weeks. 

We did my usual stuff and my doctor wrapped up our exam with me laughing of course. He's a funny guy after all. He told me the way things would go down depending on what happens with this bile salt test Monday. He said if it comes back negative, then he will go forward with the plan to deliver him June 3rd at 1:00pm. If the test comes back positive, however, he will deliver me on Friday the 20th. I have an appointment Friday anyway, which will make me 37 weeks (full term). This is the big magic number he wants me to get to and as long as Lukas is showing no signs of distress he will allow me to go until Friday. I will have my NST at that appointment to ensure everything still looks okay and he is reactive, then he will deliver him immediately afterward. So my homework this weekend was to get my bag packed up and ready just in case. Dr. Schubert said he would call me before my appointment Friday and let me know the results of the test so I knew whether to bring my goods with me or not. 

So, needless to say it was a hectic day. I told my family and the big question was how am I doing in light of this new possible complication. I am nervous and scared of course. It took the wind out of my sails a bit and took me by surprise. I had not expected anything else to happen. I didn't see how it was possible that it even could happen in light of everything else already going on. But I guess that is how life goes sometimes. It likes to throw us curve balls. To me, the biggest thing is trying to remain calm and collected until I have a definitive answer as to what is happening and why. I will do what I need to do to prepare and just hope for the best outcome possible. The rest is out of my control at this point. I am just thankful to have the team of doctors and nurses I have in my corner. I have faith in my team and I know they will do the best possible thing for Lukas and I. 

In any event, I hope you all have a beautiful weekend. My sweet mother-in-law is throwing me a "sprinkle" shower today to celebrate little Lukas before he arrives. How appropriate that celebration might prove to be in the coming days as we anticipate the news of when this amazing little boy will come into our lives.

Please keep praying for Lukas and if he does need to be delivered early, just pray everything goes smoothly and he will be okay!

Happy Saturday friends =)